Responding to Student Writing

10/19/2022

Recall what we talked about in class:
1. Consider the student you have in front of you.
2. Think about what you've asked them to do.
3. Think about what the student will do with that piece of writing next (revise, not revise, develop)
4. Think about what you need to communicate to help them to do what they have to do next with that text, and think about what the best way to communicate it to them (in writing, in a conference, a lot of information, not much information)
5. Think about how much time you have and can devote to responding.

We touched on this a little bit, but we didn't get too into it: A #6 is what can/should happen in class that will help all of the students move forward as writers, with a particular assignment, etc.

On our syllabus, you have a selection of pieces of student writing and the essay that you need to read in order to respond to that writing. I'm repeating that information here:

READ: Click here to read this essay, "Mixed Blood Stew", so that we can respond to Reading Journal Sample student writingStudent Writing.

Also: read and Respond to student writing. Click Here to access some sample student writing.

Remember the assignment (what I mean by #2 in the formula above) for reading journals. You can re-read it by clicking on this link here.

After you've read the above. In a post below, first, indicate wether you think each of the pieces of student writing are Acceptable or not Acceptable. If it's not acceptable, indicate why. Also, try to think about your answer to #6 above--no pressure, just see what you have to say.

Then, select one reading journal and indicate what you would say to this student about that piece of writing.

Finally, take a look at what your classmates have to say. Respond to at least two people. You can disagree, agree, like how they communicated something to a student, not like it. Whatever. What I don't want is to see you say "oh, yeah, I totally agree."

You have until I see you again, next week Monday, to complete this online assignment. Keep in mind, also, that on Monday, you should have the notes from your teacher ready to work on in class. The draft for workshopping will then get pushed to next week Wednesday.

Thanks for your patience. I hope you enjoy this assignment.

55 Comments

Jack Thomas Rodriguez

10/22/2022 03:18:17 pm

Student 1: Acceptable
Student 2: Acceptable
Student 3: Acceptable
Student 4: Acceptable

You can tell each of the students read the stories based on the amount of details that they give. Each journal does contain a snippet or two about what they think the main idea or thesis of the story is.

For student 1, first I would remind them to double space their journals so that I can write comments easier. I would tell them they did a good job highlighting key parts in the story and showed good understanding of the text by explaining WHY they were important. I would make a note of how they misread a certain part of the text when they wrote "she's the black pepper that white people crave", that's not what the grandmother's analogy meant. It meant that white people DIDN'T like black blood in their genealogy.

Chloe Turner

10/23/2022 07:18:57 am

Hi Jack!

I like the way you responded to the first student’s writing–the misreading stood out to me as well. I like that you emphasized the good before getting into the misinterpretation, as their journal was a good and complete one.

Ronan McGrath

10/24/2022 01:18:46 am

Hey Jack,

I definitely agree with your analysis of Student #1’s work. It’s a misreading that they should be informed on, but I suppose the positive outlook on that is that they read the text and came up with their own interpretation of it.

Emily Slack

10/24/2022 12:01:42 pm

Hey Jack, I agree with your views on student ones writing and commented on this writing as well. I agree with your take on this student writing and feel like when commenting on this student work I would encourage them to relook at their writing and look deeper into the meaning especially the quote made by grandma just as you did! Good job!

Thomas Alvarenga

10/23/2022 06:34:05 am

Taylor’s paper: I argue against it being acceptable since it does not exactly capture the main thesis of the value of mixed heritage in people and some of its plot beats seem off, like listing how the White American Parkers do not want her when it was more so about her father in the actual story.
Unnamed paper: Acceptable.
Luminda paper: Acceptable.
Ivanildo paper: Unacceptable because while it has a good summary, there is not much independent focus on the thesis beyond what they summarized.

I will tackle the paper submitted by Ivanildo. He is off to a good start. It's not perfect, but it has some of the foundations of what is required. Its summary is quite accurate for both the plot beats and even the order of events. The main issue is that it does not really pick out the thesis (or at least your interpretation of the thesis) for the passage you were given. I would start by pointing out the main thesis during the summary, so it is clear you know the thesis. If not, explain your confusion instead. If you do understand the thesis, explain how the thesis is relevant throughout the whole text. Point out how a variety of sections tie into the thesis even if it is not the main focus of that section.

10/23/2022 07:19:55 am

Hi Thomas!

I like your response to the fourth student’s writing. It was well-thought out and explained.

While I can see your point, I think that the fourth student’s journal is acceptable. It has good detail that makes it clear that they read the piece completely and they have a thesis or main idea listed. They even went beyond and included some of their own thoughts through things they found interesting about the text. Part of what confused me was that the thesis is at the beginning of the journal, not the end like a thesis usually is, but a thesis/main point is there.

Brandon Manuel Avila

10/23/2022 10:25:38 am

Hey Thomas,

Your attention to detail is something to be admired and envied because you pointed out the fourth artifact's flaw that I didn't pick up on: the lack of a central thesis. While I think the student is able to generate some basic ideas of a central idea in the first sentence of their writing, it would greatly benefit the student to develop those ideas into more specific and precise arguments. The adherence to the formula can help guide a student to bulk up their essays by either explaining confusion or their interpretation of the thesis. This gets the students writing no matter what, which to me, would be my goal for the beginning of the semester. What do you think would be the proper recourse for this student to better develop their ideas in the next reading journal?

Jack Simoes

10/23/2022 04:56:50 pm

Hi Thomas,
This is a very well thought out post and I appreciate your detail. While I took the stance of acceptable on the first piece, I can definitely see where your argument has merit. I also had made note that the thesis seemed not as "fleshed out" as I would've liked to see. I think the next journal for her could have a word count limit for the summary, perhaps it could help her develop her thesis a bit more and help reduce summary? Great post!

Mary Margaret Drew

10/24/2022 06:13:58 am

Hey Thomas,
I want to start by saying that while I do believe both the first and final works to be acceptable, I see your point. The first work (Routher's) is definitely more summary that I would like it to be, however I do feel that there is a thesis present as the writer states in the end how Rhode's wants her mother to share pride in her racial and ethnic make-up. I feel similarly to the last work by Araujo, there is a lot to the piece as the writer develops the summary and their own analysis of the work. With that being said I totally agree that the thesis, while present, is not clear. I agree that his work is not perfect and that it has a solid foundation (I love that you used this term since I often compare writing to buildings or construction projects since they take time and are of made of many complex layers).

While I don't necessarily agree with your stance on those two works I 100% understand the angle you are coming from, and I think that this is a really good thing to address for their later writings. I think that it is a really good thing that we have different opinions on these pieces because I can definitely learn from what you have shared. I find myself in that stage where grading an assignment is difficult because I was always graded in a way that my paper was broken into small portions and analyzed to shreds, so when we are asked not to do that, I find myself struggling to find a happier medium.

10/23/2022 07:05:20 am

Student one- Acceptable
Student two- Acceptable
Student three- Acceptable
Student four- Acceptable

It’s clear that the students all read the journal and they all have a thesis garnered from the piece.

Looking at student 3, I would tell them they did a good job summarizing the text and providing the details of it. I would question their interpretation towards the end, as the phrasing of the mother’s questioning of Rhodes marrying a white man and having children with him makes it seem as though Rhodes herself is questioning the decision. Further, the end of the journal misses Rhodes’ point of her mother’s periodical presence, instead interpreting her mother as being “steady” in Rhodes’ life. So just a couple things to clear up with the ending.

10/23/2022 10:16:28 am

Hey Chloe!

I appreciate the gesture to suggest that the student re-evaluates the ending so that they fully understand the implications of the narrative. The focus on understanding the author's implications is key to making any sense of the text, and I think that you are spot-on in helping the student to understand the bigger picture through a mixture of summary and analysis. How would you go about addressing this for this journal and future journals?

Allison Raposo

10/23/2022 12:18:51 pm

I agree with your point about making sure they understand what occurs at the end of the of the text. I feel that making sure the student understands the text is extremely important because they could have also been to shy to ask a question about the ending.

Madison Genest

10/23/2022 04:50:21 pm

Hi Chloe!
I noticed the detail with the ending as well, and I like how you phrased correcting the student about the ending. Phrasing it as a "question",it encourages the student to go back into the writing and see where their interpretation might be off, so they develop a better grasp of the text. That way, if they find something strong in the ending, they will feel more encouraged to write about it in the future.

Katie Rodrigues

10/23/2022 05:32:00 pm

Hi Chloe,

I agree with all of your grades for the four students, as I thought they were all acceptable as well. I also agree with you that clarification could be needed for student 3. Once clarified, the reader can then develop their critical reading skills and interpretations of texts will become easier with practice.

Cloee Cambra

10/23/2022 10:18:53 pm

Hi Chloe!
I agree that it's important to help clarify the ending of the text, as this would definitely have an impact on the student's thesis if they were to further develop it. Though I believe the first sentence is meant to be the thesis, I felt that this student accidentally touched upon it again in their last sentence. Moving forward, I think the student could develop something really substantial if they were encouraged to consider how these two sentences speak to one another!

10/24/2022 06:00:56 am

Hello Chloe,
I really loved how you addressed Taveres's work too, as I think that it is a really great piece! I agree that there are some missed opportunities for Taveres to clarify that the mother is not a constant in Rhodes life, but I think that with some guidance this could definitely be adjusted. I also understand the portion towards the end where she addresses marrying a white man, had I not had prior knowledge of the story I definitely would have taken it the wrong way. I am curious if this was the student being confused or if the writing just didn't clarify the situation since it was so briefly discussed. Overall, I really agree with what you have said and while I thought of other questions and comments you have given me a lot to think about in terms of what I COULD or SHOULD add.
Lots of love,
Maggie :)

Josh Ligor

10/24/2022 10:23:09 am

Hi Chole,

I like what you did with student 3 in terms of asking them to reevaluate the end of their own writing. Even though the student did noting wrong, I think it is important that if the student maybe just missed the mark on what they were saying it can be important to revisit to see the language better, especially if we want to build off of this assignment. I think this can help better understand the text as a whole and help the writer interpret on a deeper level.

10/24/2022 11:59:52 am

Hi Chloe, I like how you would comment on student 3s work. I think it is important to correct students work but not overbear with random corrections just for the sake of corrections. I feel like you did a good job on commenting on what needs to but also giving positives as well. Good Job!

10/23/2022 10:11:19 am

Student 1: Acceptable
Student 2: Acceptable
Student 3: Acceptable
Student 4: Acceptable

Every student was able to summarize Mixed Blood Stew quite well, so completion of the reading was made evident. Trying to make sense of the passages were hit or miss, but I think each piece has a moment of clarity where some personal perspective approaches the challenge of making sense of the text.

For Student 4, I thought their articulation of the plot of the narrative was accurate and detailed. There was a small piece of textual interrogation that I think could be explicated to a greater degree. The small paragraph beginning with, "In some part of the text I found interesting," the student raises a good point about the significance of uncomplicated versus complicated bloodlines in terms of race. In future journals, if the student raises a question, I would like to read their potential answer to that question.

"Ivanildo, you are uncovering a great point within the narrative with this question! Take this question (and others like it in the future) to the next level: why does this significance matter?"

The bigger elephant in the room for me is the unquoted usage of a racial slur in a piece of collegiate writing. Whether it's high school freshman English or ENGL 497, quotations matter when determining who said what. If an excerpt of writing is without quotation marks, I must assume that this is the student speaking in their own words. If that is the case and they use a racial slur pulled from the passage, I want to make sure that everyone reading this knows where that diction came from. Some people may interpret the liberal, unquoted use of the n-word when as an attack toward the author. I would advise the student,

"Ivanildo, you are showing intellectual initiative by pulling explicit detail from the passage, but you must make sure you make it absolutely clear when you are quoting the author and when you are using your own voice. Come speak with me after class so we can work on quotations together."

10/23/2022 12:05:52 pm

I agree with how you address the student to help them after class rather than embarrassing them in front of the entire class. I think that is a good way to maintain a relationship with the students where they feel comfortable to ask for help.

10/23/2022 06:39:53 pm

I did write down that they could've expanded on that "I found this interesting" sentence, like "Ok, why did you find it interesting? How does it relate to the thesis?" Also, good note on addressing the unquoted racial slur. It's good to let them know what other readers may think of them when they see that unquoted slur.

10/24/2022 01:24:24 am

Hey Brandon,

While I find your approach to addressing the racial slur to be tactful and well phrased, I personally think context is also a factor here. If this student has historically demonstrated lack of mastery of quotes, I would likely go with a similar approach as you have here, but if this was an isolated incident, I might pull them aside to ascertain if there was potentially another issue at play here, just to be on the safe side.

10/23/2022 12:03:54 pm

Student 1: Acceptable
Student 2: Acceptable
Student 3: Acceptable
Student 4: Acceptable
The first student used detail and imagery very effectively in their essay, and was able to summarize key ideas from the reading. They were able to formulate key ideas from the reading and create their own opinions on the text. I would go over how to use quotations in a more effective way and to cite the author after each one. I would also give them an example of another word to use to avoid repetition in a sentence. I would have one on one meetings with each student to work on what they need help with.

10/23/2022 04:53:03 pm

Hi Allison!
These are great points and I also did my examination on the first piece. I like how you pointed out the repetition. I was considering marking that as well but I wasn't sure if that was something to be encouraged or discouraged. I would also agree that the quotations should be better marked in future writing. Great findings!

10/23/2022 05:36:33 pm

Hi Allison,

I agree with you on your evaluations on all of the student writing and what you wrote for sample student 1. The student was very thorough in using details from the text, demonstrating that they read the material. I think one on one meetings with the students can be very beneficial and help them in the long run.

Francesca Ligotti

10/24/2022 09:53:38 am

Hi Allison! I agree that the student did a great job creating imagery and summarized their essay well. Would you go over quotation usage with all students- and frame it as a response to question six- "what can/should happen in class that will help all of the students move forward as writers, with a particular assignment, etc. " because I think that incorporating quotation is a huge skill that every student may need a reminder on- especially if it is a writing class. Great post

10/23/2022 04:47:41 pm

Student 1: Acceptable
Student 2: Acceptable
Student 3: Acceptable
Student 4: Acceptable
I thought each student demonstrated a good summary of what they have read, so it is evident that they have done the reading.

For student two, I would say how I noticed they put in a summary that referenced the text throughout, and remind them to use citations whenever neccessary. I would encourage this student to think more about why the grandmother's point is so powerful for a potential future essay. Overall, I noticed how they used a lot of quotations and made a connection at the end.

10/23/2022 06:34:06 pm

I agree that student 2 used quotations well, if anything they need some help with capitalization and punctuation which are relatively easy things to fix.

10/23/2022 10:11:20 pm

Hi Madison!
I definitely agree that student 2 had a substantial summary of the text. Though their thesis didn't emerge until the last paragraph of the journal, it demonstrated a thorough understanding of the text. As you said, I'd encourage them to think further about the importance of the grandmother's point. After reading all of the journals, I think it could be beneficial to allot some in-class time to this idea. Each student is capable of coming up with what student 2 did, and I'd love to see how this student could build upon what they already understand!

Claire Morck

10/24/2022 09:52:54 am

Hi Madison,
I agree with your comments with student 2, and I agree that even if citation is not being graded, it is important to point things like that out so they can grow as a writer.

10/23/2022 04:51:10 pm

1-Acceptable
2-Acceptable
3-Acceptable
4-Acceptable

Student One Reply
The first passage was a good piece of writing overall. I would make note of the clear and concise detail that shows the student has taken the time to read and summarize this piece, "Good Summarization and detail". I would also make a quick mark at the end about capitalization and word choice, the writing is good and shows a lot of potential but I think by choosing certain words can help elevate her writing. I would also make note that they may want to develop a deeper thesis. She makes it clear that she has put time into analyzing the piece, I think there was more to be had in terms of thesis.

Madeline Newhall

10/26/2022 08:54:54 pm

Hi Jack, I thought it was great when you focused on one student in particular. I also agree with all of your comments in order to help improve the student's reading response for the first one. Overall, you did a great job and keep up the great work!

10/23/2022 05:29:37 pm

Student 1: Acceptable
Student 2: Acceptable
Student 3: Acceptable
Student 4: Acceptable

Throughout all of the sample readings from each student, you could tell that they all read the short excerpt and retained the information. They all summarized the plot of the reading well and one could tell that they were paying attention to what they were reading by the details they were giving.

Student 2 had a pretty well written reading journal. They pulled evidence from the reading and incorporated it into their writing. They then even included their own thoughts or feelings at the end of the journal. They also included what they thought the main point of the reading was. They gave what they thought was the theme and the most relevant points of the reading. I would write that they need to capitalize different countries and ethnicities in their writing, but that is a minor issue that can be easily fixed. there would also be a few grammatical errors that would need to be fixed, but that could be something that is practiced throughout all of the student writing. Overall, they did a good job on their writing.

10/24/2022 09:57:11 am

Hi Katie! I agree with your scoring of all four reading journals- the students were all able to provide coherent summaries. I like the idea of going over grammar issues for example with all of the students- initially so the students do not feel alone in their mistakes but also that every student needs to brush up on grammar at one point or another. Great post! : )

10/23/2022 10:02:08 pm

Student 1: Acceptable
Student 2: Acceptable
Student 3: Acceptable
Student 4: Acceptable

Ivanildo’s work (student 4) is a great example of why reading journals should be graded according to the expectations laid out for them rather than our personal feelings towards them. Though the student wasn’t able to flesh out an explicit thesis, they raised important questions that fulfilled the established requirements, while also considering the implications of certain parts of the assigned text. When commenting on this, I’d be sure to point out the value of this commentary: “Ivanildo, great job raising important questions here! I enjoyed reading through your commentary and would love, going forward, for you to elaborate more on parts of the text that you feel are most valuable. What do you think the author is really trying to tell us here?”

Brandon, in his post, raised a very important point about the use of quotations, especially when considering the language used in the text. Though we aren’t here to teach grammar explicitly, it’s important that our students are aware of the implications of slurs. While I’m confident that this was an innocent mistake on the student’s part, I would definitely address it privately with Ivanildo. I’m not sure that I’d mark it on the paper, though, as I think this would come across as a grammar correction (which most students don’t pay much attention to) rather than an important distinction to make in our writing.

10/24/2022 01:13:59 am

Student #1: Acceptable
Student #2: Acceptable
Student #3: Acceptable
Student #4: Acceptable

While I do not entirely agree with every interpretation presented through these responses, it is apparent that every student read, summarized, and responded to key elements of the text by offering an interpretation of the meaning of the work. As such, each student fulfilled the mandates of the assignment and as such may be deemed as acceptable (despite some rather unacceptable choices in writing).

In regards to Luminda’s work, while one could point out errors in verb tense, the greatest hurdle for this student to overcome is their lack of an elegant flow. While coherent and comprehensible, the stop-and-start nature of many sentences or isolated phrases greatly hinders the quality of this student’s writing despite the apparent preparation through their clear and complete summary of the text. Furthermore, it feels as though their coverage of the overall thematic machinations of the text are mostly implied or somewhat vague, so I would likely ask them to emphasize this aspect in their writing a little more.

Maddy Ames

10/24/2022 06:06:16 am

I liked how you were encouraging about the student's work before you listed what you would change. I agreed with what you said about the Luminda RJ; the stop and go feel of the student's writing was a little tricky, but what was important was the student's understanding, and I felt like that was there. I was always taught to identify every painstaking detail of the essay given to me, so reading these essays from a new point of view was super cool to me.

10/24/2022 10:19:53 am

Hi Ronan,

I too responded to Luminda and I think you make a good point on the nature of her cadence throughout her writing. I think that would be a fair thing to respond with in an assignment like this because the voice and the flow in these journals is what gives them life. Thanks for sharing!

10/24/2022 05:54:57 am

1. Acceptable
2. Acceptable
3. Acceptable
4.Acceptable

I want to begin by saying that I believe that all of these works are acceptable, as they all do what was asked of them. With that being said I think that if I had to choose one to comment on I would address Tavares's piece. While it may not follow all the grammatical rules it does provide a summary of the work and clearly states a thesis. My comments for Tavares would be "I really love the attention to detail you provided in this summary", "Why do you think that her mom was so against her being proud of her African heritage?", and "Why do you think it is important to note that the grandmother had some white blood in her?".

I want to say that Cloee brings up a really good point in how the assignments aren't designed to look for grammatical or structural errors but to see if the student is able to apply the ideas they read in the text. I think that works such as Tavares do this really nicely. Yes, the work was not adhering to every grammatical rule, but it was clear and concise. Overall, I loved all of these readings and I definitely can tell that these students enjoyed Rhodes work or at least thoroughly read it.

10/24/2022 05:55:36 am

Student 1: A
Student 2: A
Student 3: A
Student 4: A

Comments: I would have Student 1 double space her essay next time just to have her prepare for future academic writing assignments. The details that Student 1 included in her essay showed me that she paid attention to the reading. Student 4's writing was a little hard for me to follow, but they did what was asked of them.

Overall, even if I did not entirely agree with the student's interpretation, they did what was asked of them in their assignments.

10/26/2022 08:52:13 pm

Hi Maddy, you did a great job when it came to reviewing the journals. As well as going into detail about the ways to enhance each reading response. More specifically the suggestions that you included to help enhance student 1 and student 4 reading responses. Great job overall and keep up with the good work.

10/24/2022 09:47:37 am

Student 1- acceptable
Student 2- acceptable
Student 3- acceptable
Student 4- acceptable

All examples of student work would be considered acceptable as they provided a summary of the work, reacted to it in some way. Though each piece of writing was different, it is clear that each student read the entire text and understood it to some degree.
To respond to question 6, "what can/should happen in class that will help all of the students move forward as writers, with a particular assignment, etc. " I think focusing on pulling key details and the organization of those details would be beneficial for this group of students.

For this example I would respond to Luminda Tavares- I would congratulate her and share that I am impressed with how she communicates key ideas within the text. Luminda is able to not only recall detail, but think critically about those ideas and weave them to create a coherent, and complete summary while understanding characterization- specifically the mother's struggle with identity and self acceptance.

10/24/2022 09:50:48 am

Student 1: Acceptable
- Notes: make sure to double space! I really enjoyed the attention to detail, which was demonstrated through a short, but useful plot, and rhetorical questions. Also- try to use paragraph formatting to separate ideas.
Student 2: Acceptable
- Notes: the thesis was great! I really agreed with the points being made, and all the plot summary filtered right into the thesis.
Student 3: Acceptable
- Notes: in a quick read, it was hard to find the thesis, but I got the gist of it. Not relevant, but having one chunk of text can make it difficult to read.
Student 4: Acceptable
- Notes: Hard to follow, but there was a thesis and it met the word count.

10/24/2022 10:13:45 am

Student 1: Acceptable
Student 2: Acceptable
Student 3: Acceptable
Student 4: Acceptable

Each student's journal met the criteria to be considered an "acceptable journal" by the standards of the assignment. Each journal had different ways of getting to the acceptable category, but they all had what was important to consider it done.

Question 6 leads me to say that if this is an assignment that is going to lead into another bigger assignment such as a paper, these journals are all great starting points in getting ideas on paper so that they can further expand on some of the points that they made while writing these journals.

Responding to Luminda's piece, I would tell her that her summary was very thorough without being too wordy and that she has a good understanding of the text assigned for the journal. I would also tell her that her thesis is strong and supported with some of the claims she is making about the mother and her struggles and that is something that she can build on in the future if it leads her down that path.

10/24/2022 01:56:52 pm

Hello Josh. I think you made a well detailed response to Luminda's paper. I also found it acceptable. I could not find much to point out as a short coming. It is only the syntax that I think has some issues, but that is really pebbles in terms of problems. Her summary is on point and she was able to identify a thesis. Even if it is mostly summary with not much in the way of original viewpoints (thought that was not the most required of things), her paper manages to tell her own view of the thesis in a pragmatic way.

Alexyss

10/25/2022 01:13:16 pm

Hi Josh,

I also agree how each reading journal is acceptable. I like how you mentioned the standard of the assignment as we did in class. I also enjoy your optimism on each one of these journals possibly leading to a bigger assignment. Good post

10/24/2022 12:05:12 pm

Student 1: Acceptable
I felt that this was an acceptable reading response regardless of the structure of the work. The student was able to show knowledge in the reading.
Student 2: Acceptable
This was also acceptable. Student showed that they read the work and understood that. The summary at the end showed students thesis and understanding.
Student 3: Acceptable
This Reading Journal was acceptable the summary was good and stuck out to me.
Student 4: Acceptable
This Reading Journal had an in-depth summary and was obvious that the student read this and understood what was happening in the article.

Students should be able to pass in work and feel that they will be seen but also told what was good about their work. Personally, I hate getting negative comments on my work and feel it doesn’t help to read all the things I did wrong. Of course, students need to have criticism on their work to be able to do better but when all they have is negatives and no positives, I feel it is not as helpful. Creating a classroom that allows students to pass in work and get feedback that is not all nitpicking and negatives is important.

I would comment on students’ one’s paper on the positives they did on this journal. I would complement their summary because it shows that they read but also had a good understanding on this writing. I would complement their questions that they prompted in their writing. I would underline the quotes placed in the journal because I also felt those stuck out to me and felt they are important. I would encourage the reader to relook at all quotes and double look at them to make sure that they are correct in the sense of the story (since one of the quotes seems like she/he takes out of the correct context). I would comment on the double space, but no points would be taken off for this. I would just mention that it is easier to add my feedback when it is double spaces.

10/24/2022 12:56:23 pm

I like your in depth comment. I fully agree with the fact that you need to provide both positive and negative feedback so students can learn. Both only negative, and arguably only positive, comments can hamper growth. I say one can put a positive spin to criticism, phrase things as "how they can do better" rather than "what they did wrong". Another way is to say the negative with the positive at the same time so that they do not get overwhelmed by the negative side as much. Criticism should be helpful and if we say it in a helpful way, it will help. I think you are on the right direction and I hope my input can help you out a bit as well.

10/25/2022 12:53:57 pm

Hi Emily,

I also wrote how I believed each reading journal was acceptable. I agree how each student had a good idea of what was going on followed by a good summary. I like how you wrote out individually your take on each summary (whether it was in-depth or not). **Good point on students being able to submit what they think is a well written. Good post!

10/25/2022 12:46:20 pm

Student one- Acceptable
Student two- Acceptable
Student three- Acceptable
Student four- Acceptable

While reading each student’s response carefully, I had no question that every student not only read it, but was able to understand it. Throughout their response, it shows how much they were personally able to retain. Understanding and being able to explain what happens in the plot or plot twist is very important, and is what each student did. Therefore, I am convinced that all of their reading journals are acceptable.

I decided to narrow my focus on student number one. To me, the journal is complete but there are a few things the student could work on. One of these includes making her response a little easier to read. (I personally got attacked on my very first writing journals by not double spacing them, so I would suggest that.) Though it is not a major part of the grade, I would remind them to re-read their work before submitting for minor issues such as grammar and such. (Though we are all guilty of this at some point!) I would conclude my comments with this is a good piece of writing that could be developed into a paper.

10/26/2022 08:45:17 pm

Student 1: Acceptable
Student 2: Acceptable
Student 3: Acceptable
Student 4: Acceptable
I would say for that each student did a very good job when it came to responding to this reading. Much of their responses fit the material very well. It was clear that they did in fact read the material and understood it well enough to write the responses fairly clearly.
Something that I would comment on would be student number one with the reason being that there is not enough clarification throughout their response. As well as the structure being slightly sloppy. But did do a great job when it came to getting the point across.

Howard Wilson link

10/28/2022 01:57:02 am

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Philip Logan link

10/29/2022 02:32:56 am

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Michael Walters link

11/3/2022 12:42:03 am

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Tony Carlson link

11/12/2022 12:16:56 pm

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Responding to Student Writing

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